Hey protester, no mask? Go play in the NFL without a helmet

People are stupid.

Case in point: a CNN article headlined “Face masks have become America's new fault line.”

Here’s the stupid part: Many of the people who want to go out in public are the ones refusing to wear the masks. I find this downright mystifying. There’s no argument that coronavirus is dangerous, and that you can catch it through the air. So why would people who want to go out more often be the same ones who not wearing masks?

For a long time, the CDC was, inexplicably, telling people not to wear masks — even though this was standard operating procedure during the Spanish flu of 1918, and it’s just common sense that a barrier would lower the risk of contracting it.

The CDC finally changed this “guidance” to encourage masks April 3, more than a month after the crisis came to light. Better late than never, I suppose, except for the thousands who became infected during that month. Maybe the CDC got tired of hearing people like me wonder why moms everywhere tell their kids to cover their mouths when they cough, but the CDC somehow didn’t believe a barrier would be effective.

Bizarre.

Even more bizarre, however, is the fact that those who want to loosen stay-at-home restrictions are the same ones flouting the CDC’s current, rational device by refusing to wear face masks.

Has the COVID-19 mess cost you money, maybe even your job? I get why you’re upset. Sick of staying at home all the time? Stir crazy? I get that, too.

But if you do go out, why the hell don’t you wear a mask? Refusing to wear a mask isn’t a protest. It’s just plain stupid.

And reckless. Why not go walking around naked while you’re at it. Makes just as much sense in times like these.

Imagine if the NFL decided to protest a governor’s orders not to play football games by telling its players to suit up anyway. “But, oh yeah, don’t wear a helmet. We’re going to play without ’em to protest the government trying to tell us what to do. What’s that? You’re afraid you might get a concussion? Too bad. Suck it up.”

Except there’s a difference: Concussions aren’t contagious.

Protest, but wear a mask

If I wanted to defy the government and go out on some nonessential errand, that’s precisely when I would wear a mask. The mask has nothing to do with some government edict. It has everything to do with not getting sick.

It wouldn’t be the government infecting me if I caught COVID-19. It would be the stinkin’ virus. And that virus wouldn’t give even half a damn whether I was protesting or not.

Protester: “I’ll show the government!”

Virus: “I’ll show that protester! Hehehehe!”

Some people resent being told what to do. I get that, too. But rebelling against arbitrary authority is one thing; rebelling against common sense is another. If the government is telling you to do something that actually makes sense, defiance is not only pointless, it’s (I’ll use that word again) stupid. The NFL does, in fact, insist that players wear helmets. But you don’t see players trying to take the field without them just because they don’t like being told what to do.

That’s childish. And stupid.

If you’re stupid enough to let yourself get infected while engaging in one of these protests, that’s on you. No sympathy here, dude. Problem is, you might infect someone else, and that’s not just stupid, it’s gross negligence.

In fact, people like you are part of the reason I’d be wearing a mask in public, whether or not the government required it.

If you can’t comprehend that I’d be protecting myself, just look at it as a form of protest.

A protest against your stupidity.

This guy’s not stupid. He just had his helmet knocked off. Protesters wearing masks don’t have that excuse. They’re not going to get a concussion, but are they brain damaged?